a diary page found strewn (shrewd) about at Chernobyl

I was up late just rereading a ritual and imagining myself moving through each part. I am up late and no one esle is awake in the house so I have the luxury of finding no resistance to my needs. Right now my needs are very simple. I want to unite, I want to watch our love flourish ...and I want to witness my heart's survival through it all. There are a lot of shifting bits of data to work through. But as I have already touched on survival - I would like to stay here and survive. It is imparative that I make it through the ordeals of my inner workings. I have desires. : wild - wanting would tear through me-just to prance - to make some loud stance - to boast about love's effect -oh, to pointblank say - > no love is as pure nor as potent as this love that we are transmitting <- and also note I would never apologize for the obsurity of life. .... even when sorting through lifes ample cinicial work arounds - I would not consider or suggest for a moment to put on a cycic's robe. I think - we are being smart, displacing, redirecting it - and I am removed - as removed as I can be, as we can spare me to be, as I have requested - yet I am near...I am here, and nightly I lay within my thinking and I have peered over my own mind's edge ... into the reflection, "oh hello"

- yes, fabled-

to greet my joy and fawn over my luck - selfishly, yet within the natural mandates of this design- "hello" - to myself and hello to you- "hello". Love looks beautiful on all of us. - creating opportunities - Next I am thinking about the words that bring prospects of chance encounters (((only to be spirited away))). ...There is no time to linger in a physical space- for what would I do-within the power of a gaze? This is about survival!