Knitted...Knotted...Mirror... Mirror...

it is just the world, I think you can agree. When I watch the news I feel various sorts of alarms but this isn't - on the flip it is exciting to live when lasting history is being made - I can't wish my way back (forth, forward) with idealistic idea of "power to the people" marches, the fashion was on point and that is the least of the obsession with that collective weirding time - which would be nice to be in that vibe... (but then there was Vietnam shit) and ... well this

I was up till like 3 am and I had therapy at 8 am so I do need a nap. I will blame it on the stimulants. Who drinks a huge ice coffee at 3 pm when still burning off a slow release boost? - and then it is about living with your choices. Ice coffee is really only gonna be for weekends now. (((duh))) There is plenty to do. Josh has been away for days and he will return tomorrow... I am going to make the union feel so good....it's all playing out in my mind. I am amped up.

I stayed on this all day. ...and finally I can move on to a new project. ...this was about all the fun I have being me, living life and finding all the joy. When Hell Freezes Over

(full of errors so you know it's real) ...Its been a full month, quick month - it's summer and the sun has been so vibrant but today it is raining and we need a little refresh of rain around here so it does feel decadent to be sitting here drinking my coffee in a relaxed mindset. I am working from home again today - it is what my dreams have been made of for the last few years - a work from home job doing work I love. It may be strange to some, but shurely not all, that m

Duty A note on the chief rules of practical conduct to be observed by those who accept the Law of Thelema. By Aleister Crowley. (This document © O.T.O.) “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.” AL I:40 “There is no law beyond Do what thou wilt.” AL III:60 “[…] thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that, and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect.” AL I:42-44 “Love is the law, love un

It's almost June! I’ve been so busy that I haven't taken the time to sit and blog, but I have also been so happy, calm, and at peace. Because of that, I don't feel like I've had a lot I needed to get off my chest. I am just so thankful for the quiet inside my mind and the quiet presently all around me—except for the distant sounds of waterfalls, which are about 50 feet from my cabin. I am in Ithaca, New York this weekend. I rented a cabin, set it up this morning, and now I'm

Last night I dreamt about my mom, which makes so much sense as yesterday was Mother’s Day, so I had been thinking about her throughout the day. In the dream, she was around 30, her skin was golden, her laugh unmistakable, and her hair was long and still brunette. She was warm and sun-kissed. It was good to see her. I woke up at 5:00. Josh is away in Boston, so Jet filled in and laid next to me, being snuggly. I had a little bit of dread—I can't place it yet. There is a lot go

I do follow his videos daily and wanted to save this one for all the interesting bits within.

This week has been busy. I was able to get a lot done at my job (which I love very much), while also juggling the added layers of two therapists and the couples therapy which is ongoing. Even when we are not with the therapist day in and day out, we have our therapy homework and a shared goal of working towards a safe space for communication. We really needed this—we really needed an additional support system because it helps us build larger safe spaces for us to work through

This weekend was incredibly relaxing, but somehow I got a lot done! I donated four bags of clothing after weeks of decluttering, which is so unlike me, yet here I am doing it weekend after weekend lol. I spent quality time with a friend and just enjoyed the moment. I went thrift store shopping (same place I dropped off the four bags of clothes so I dropped off four bags, and then came home three separate clothing pieces I feel like that is a very good trade… Leading me towar

Really, the sky is a beautiful sight. Thankful for the view tonight, my heart swells in love for the moments of reprieve. Real reprieve. A pause. Anyway, that's what I want and need. I'm working out some stable peace within the thoughts I'm tracking—I get restless—and that is why joy is a channel and a release. It’s been weeks now of heightened, too-much-caffeine energy because I fell in love with a caffeinated drink (sadly, it’s not calorie-free). Anyway, I want the space of

Today is a Thelemic holiday! I touched on this briefly with Josh - as he isn't very interested in Thelema - I kept it brief. But today is recognized as the first day Crowley received The Book of the Law. April 8 (Day 1): The first chapter, voiced by Nuit , the Egyptian goddess of the infinite night sky. This chapter introduces the core law: "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law." April 9 (Day 2): The second chapter, voiced by Hadit , representing the infinit

It is a slow week—it’s the kind of week I am relieved to find myself in. This last weekend was so much cuddling and connection time. We had a fire, the first of the season, and I hammocked! There were crumbs in bed, and little sips between big sips with skin-sticky contact points. It was one of those epic chill weekends—winter isn't even here anymore and we are happy about it. Last week ended with some stress and my fears were tested again—because I have them—fears, and they